In DD#00001 I said that love is easy. Love just appears inside us, no effort required.
What's hard is what takes effort: the work it takes to make a relationship function and thrive.
However, all of us, no matter how much we may be "in" love, have a limit of what we can offer, can give.
A huge challenge is to make sure what we give goes towards choices and actions that actually have impact, create a stronger connection, and deeper trust; putting love's energy into building something lasting.
What makes this challenging is that love is also used to "smooth over" or "look past" stuff in our partners that we would otherwise be annoyed with, bothered by, or distracted by.
Love's energy can fill in gaps to help a couple better fit together, but what love is used this way cannot be used in another, making some percentage of your available energy always devoted to the effort if smoothing, forgiving, and looking past.
The fewer of these ill-fitting attributes, the more energy available for the building, the concrete effort of building and maintaing a relationship.
Or, more simply, the more compatible you are as people, the more successful you'll be as lovers.
At this point in our discovery, we are deeply compatible people. We share so many fundamental interests, perspectives, and opinions... its simply astonishing, thrilling!
These fundamental personality compatibilities limit our day-to-day personality frictions, giving us more energy to devote to concrete expressions of our mutual love.
That we are just getting started in this discovery makes me all the more optimistic. We will inevitably find some stuff that bothers the other, but we'll also find more sync points. The basic core of our natures point us along the same trajectory, providing us similar, but different perspectives. We are not the same, but what we share is so fundamental that when we finally took the time to really get know to each other, we instantly became old friends.
Its rare to encounter such people, those with whom you immediately, fundamentally connect with.
Its vastly more rare for you and a new person to share a potent mutual physical attraction, be single, and be open to such a powerful connection.
You gotta play to win; we were and we did!
